Women4Africa.com

What Is Your Perception Of A Sexy Woman?

editor — Fri, 13 Jul 2012 18:53:14 +0000

All women love a good compliment but what is your perception of a beautiful sexy African woman? Does anyone loathe to be branded as sexy? I wonder if there are any women out there who would actually find such a compliment offensive, so now you can have your say.

I’m very sure your definition of sexy between the ages 16-18 must have dramatically changed as opposed to now, maybe you are in your late 30s and over. Now, depending on the mind of who’s viewing and what exactly is on show, looking sexy and being a sexy woman have different meanings so your response and contributions would be great. I will not necessarily conclude sexiness to wearing a short dress, having long hair or exposing some flesh as some seem to think always (rolling my eyes) In fact, at often times….too much of an exposed flesh can look very tacky and damaging to your reputation, depending on what the occasion is and where you wore the outfit to.. hoping not a business meeting of course.

Flirting can be as sexy as a wicked smile (winks) A very attractive, alluring woman, arousing desire may be classified as sexy but then there are plenty of those who are not visually a wow factor that are sexy and those that are equally visually beautiful that are not so sexy. What makes a woman sexy is not always her most obvious characteristics, surely the physical appearance has a lot to do with it but it runs much deeper than that. Your style and charisma can be a bonus but hey, check this out…… A woman who is comfortable with herself is top notch sexy. A woman that carries herself with class, not snobbish, exudes confidence, has integrity, impeccable manners, is also very sexy.

Having independence too fits the bill perfectly. So for those that don’t know it, its not always about the outward appearance of revealing outfits, these are temporary but more importantly, feeling good and loving yourself is more sexy. When next you look in the mirror, see that sexy, strong, confident woman staring back at you and squeal …..YESSSSSSSSSS I love me. See it and believe it.Rehearse the scene until it becomes real to you. Life may throw some curve balls but find that inner strength daily. Relate your sexiness to the positive things. Stay blessed till next time.

We are women4Africa empowering each other. Please contribute……..

Yours Truly

Tdlight Dagazau.

SAEON

editor — Sun, 27 May 2012 19:19:32 +0000

Singer-songwriter with the stage name “Saeon” began singing at the age of four and went professional in 2009. Saeon is versatile in her style of music and gets her inspiration from every and anything around her, mostly, alternative R’n'B, Rock, Pop and a little bit of rap.

Saeon read History and International Relations in Babcock University, Nigeria and did a Masters in International Relations (with focus on the CIA’s Covert Activities and America’s Foreign Policy, Terrorism and Counter Terrorism) in Warwick University in the United Kingdom.

Saeon like many others is a Woman 4 Africa.

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Here’s a link to her YouTube channel to listen to and watch more of Saeon. http://www.youtube.com/saeonmusic

The Must Have Book – ‘EYO’

editor — Sat, 14 Apr 2012 08:57:04 +0000

I recently had the pleasure of speaking to one of the ‘Women4Africa’ nominees who had been nominated for the ‘Social and Humanitarian of the year’ category and she happened to mention that she was in actual fact also an author. When I now saw an interview that she did talking about a book she had written, I took it upon myself to ask her for a copy as it sounded like an interesting read.

She kindly obliged and I received the book within a couple of days. Once I started reading the book I couldn’t put it down. I found myself waking up early just to continue reading as I couldn’t wait for the start of the day and did not want the daily activities to get in the way of my reading. The book is ‘Amazing’, ‘Fantastic’, ‘Awesome’, and every other word that fits these categories, but don’t take my word for it, find out for yourself just what I am talking about. Abidemi Sanusi is an ‘outstanding writer’.

The title of the book is called ‘EYO’ and below is a brief synopsis and details of where you can grab yourself a copy because I can assure you I won’t be letting mine out of my site.

EYO

Eyo, an illiterate 10-year-old girl is trafficked to the UK with promises of a better life. The novel follows her five year journey as a domestic servant and eventual sex slave in the UK, her attempts to escape and her journey around the UK as she’s passed from one human trafficker to another. Eventually, she is rescued, only to realise that in even in freedom society demands an exacting price from those it should protect.

Eyo was shortlisted for the Commonwealth Writers’ Prize 2010.

Eyo is available in the UK only via the author’s website, www.abidemisanusi.co.uk. The ebook is available from Amazon and other leading online retailers.

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S MONTH

editor — Sat, 03 Mar 2012 19:12:46 +0000

So March is here and everyone is talking about International Women’s month or women’s day and there are a number of events going on this month of March. It is definitely great to see that women are being celebrated all over.

For many of us, women’s day is every day! We never ceased to be women and our roles are continuous. I say we remember to celebrate ourselves more often than we do and that means having more ‘ME’ time, relaxing at health spas, occasional massage to relieve the tension and stress and then read a good book. Let’s not under-estimate the power of reading a good book. That brings me to my suggested readings for this month of March.

BEAUTY by Robin McKinley
SINGING AWAY THE HUNGER by Mpho M’atsepo Nthunya and K Limakatso Kendall
UNBOWED: MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY by Wangari Maathai

And that’s just a few to get you started.

Happy Women’s Month to you all.

By Adiah .J.

Who Runs the World? Girls?

editor — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 11:11:59 +0000

Thanks to Mrs Beyonce Giselle Carter, the new catch phrase on every young woman’s lips at the moment is Who Runs The World (Girls)(WRTW(G)). Her first single from her new album 4 has instantaneously become the new anthem for female empowerment. With other singles like ‘Single Ladies’ from her previous album, Survivor and Independent Woman from her earlier days with Destiny’s Child, Mrs Carter is known for being one of the pioneers of the modern day Girl Power Movement through song and lyrics.

Before her there was Aretha Franklin with R.E.S.P.E.C.T or Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves featuring Annie Lennox. Chaka Khan gave us I’m Every Woman which was later redone by Whitney Houston for the movie The Bodyguard. In more recent times, Alicia Keys blessed us with Super Woman and who can forget Christina Aguilera’s sassy rendition of Can’t Hold Us Down featuring L’Il Kim in 2007? There have been many others and there will be many more.

When I heard WRTW(G) for the first time, I found it uplifting and was incited to be a better version of myself. I quietly prayed that Mrs Carter, who I must add has gone down in the history books as one of the female music icons of our generation, would use the imminent music video to show a different side to her.

With lyrics like; “…How we’re smart enough to make these millions. Strong enough to bare the children. Then get back to business…” I wished for a video that highlighted our struggles as women, whilst also celebrating our triumphs. And then she continues; “… my persuasion can build a nation. Endless power. Our love we can devour…” At this point I envisaged a tribute to Emmeline Pankhurst, Rosa Parks, Mary Robinson, Oprah Winfrey, Arianna Huffington, Madeline Albright, Condoleeza Rice, Christine Lagarde and Hillary Clinton.

I got excited thinking about these and a host of other women who have paved the way for us by shattering glass ceilings. It could have been the retro-feminist in me but I soon snapped out of it when I discovered that Mrs Carter had instead settled for the obvious and ubiquitous option of a video full of her usual saucy dance moves and sultry fashion. However, I assumed that between the horses and the lions and the dance battles with an army of men, we are supposed to derive some sort of symbolism of women standing up to and striving against adversity.

Listening to the song made me think. What if women indeed ruled the world? Because the sad reality is no matter how loudly we sing these girl power anthems or try to make ourselves believe the lyrics, it is quite simply NOT true. The question still remains, can we as women rule the world? Will we ever? Would we make better leaders? There are indeed five famous men who at different moments and in different ways have expressed why they believe so:

Dalai Lama: (Buddhist Leader)

“Western women can come to the rescue of the world. Some people may call me a feminist. But we need more effort to promote basic human values, human compassion, human affection. And in that respect, females have more sensitivity for others’ pain and suffering.”

Desmond Tutu: (South African Activist and retired Anglican Archbishop)

“Women should Rule the World. Some of the best initiatives are those that occur because women are involved… It is almost a tacit acknowledgement of the crucial role that women play in nurturing, nurturing life. This revolution… is the last, best chance for making this globe hospitable to peace, to make this globe hospitable to compassion, hospitable to generosity and caring.”

Ted Turner: (Billionaire Media Mogul and ex-husband of Jane Fonda)

“I’ve said for years and I’m really serious about it, I think men should be barred from holding public office for a hundred years. They have been running the world for the last thousands of years and they’ve mucked up something awful. I built my business surrounding myself with women. I find women more superior to men in business.”

Martin Amis: (British Novelist)

“World ruled by women would be a better place. I have a dream. I see a day when politics is feminised, where female values move into the public sphere in a way they haven’t quite done yet.”

Michael Winner: (British Film Director and Producer)

“Men are ridiculous. Women are far better people. Much wiser (not difficult) and with a temperament to deal with life’s complexities and men’s abrasiveness… So I think it’s about time women took over. What they have to put up with is beyond belief. Pathetic, bullying men who throw their weight about (and there’s usually a lot of it) in a vain attempt to prove they’re superior when, in truth, they know they’re not.”

The status quo is far from ideal and all of the above ring true. It came as no surprise to me that many seem to think that not enough women care enough about gender equality to unite and make a real difference. The truth is most women are too busy doing the things that men by nature can’t do. If you are expecting a male bashing article that lists the reasons why women would make better leaders, I am sorry to disappoint you as that is not my view even as a young self-proclaimed retro-feminist.

Women should be allowed equal opportunities to men, but I will never advocate on a woman’s behalf on the basis of her gender alone and nothing else. Instead, I would advocate for women to be given the same chances from a very early age so that the girl child too can grow up armed with the knowledge and experience necessary to make the right choices for a successful life. There is a cultural myth that still exists in many societies that the boy child is superior. This is especially prominent in families from impoverished backgrounds who would rather send their son to school instead of their daughter if they can’t afford to educate both. These are some of the issues that I believe feminists should concern themselves with. The emphasis should be on OPPORTUNITIES and not EQUAL alone.

I sincerely wish that inequality was not an issue and that we had a lot more women in high places than we do now. However, provided that there is a system that favours both genders as far as education is concerned, would the ideal not be a world wherein gender is not the issue and it was more about whoever is QUALIFIED for the job? It is true that men often see leadership as a means to caress their egos and exercise their machismo and gung-ho characteristics.

Many argue that women have emotional intelligence unlike men and are more likely to be trust worthy and open while putting an emphasis on collaboration, empowerment, interdependence, compassion and interpersonal relationships. Also, you are less likely to hear about women leaders being involved in some of the recent sex scandals that have made the news headlines. The question however remains, are these just sweeping stereotypical generalisations? Does gender really matter? Can we say categorically that one gender understands the true meaning and nature of leadership better than the other? Who is to say that Matriarchy is better than Patriarchy or vice versa? Especially since when most women speak about Matriarchy their understanding of it is that men and women should be equal. Surely it is more complex than that. Gender equality for me will be equal opportunities for CHANGE not equal opportunities for the status quo to remain but under a different gender.

John C Maxwell, an American evangelical author, defined a leader as; “one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.” To a great extent I agree. However there is more. Leadership can be messy and is not always straightforward. The idea that there is a shortlist of specific characteristics set in stone, for a good leader is preposterous. This is because leadership encompasses various different scenarios from organisation to organisation, business to business and country to country. And there are certain characteristics that work better in some situations than they do in others.

When you are a leader, there are times that you have to make unpopular decisions. Like a friend once said; “To err is human, to forgive is NOT company policy.” So out goes the compassion! To pretend that leadership is all honky dory and positive and to wish the dreadful bits away is taking a huge step towards failure. We hope for change. We hope for a day that women with the same talents, qualifications and experiences as men would be given the same opportunities to prove themselves for the same salaries. However we can’t say that leadership belongs exclusively to one gender. As a matter of fact it is more a reality that women and men need to stop the power struggle and learn to be more interdependent.

There is so much that both genders could learn from each other. Both genders have the tools to be great leaders. Some strengths are better appreciated than others and some weaknesses may need to be compensated for. However all it takes is for both sides to discuss the elephant in the room and to understand what the true meaning of leadership is. And part of that involves accepting that leadership is not necessarily for everyone. It has become a common rhetoric that we must all strive to be leaders. What is the point of a shepherd with no flock?

It is important that we first of all embark on achieving excellence in all that we do and that does not always equate to leadership. As Anthony F Smith (Co-Founder and a Managing Director of Leadership Research Institute and author of The Taboos of Leadership: 10 Secrets No One Will Tell You about Leaders and What They Really Think) pointed out “We can’t forget that some of the greatest individuals in history had a significant impact in life without being a leader. We would be much better off if everyone believed that they can and should be a productive, wonderful, compassionate, loving human being.”

Written by Pamilerin Beckley

SINGLE MOTHERS MISUNDERSTOOD

editor — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 00:50:08 +0000

I wrote this poem as I feel that single mothers need to be celebrated rather than stigmatised, praised rather than frowned upon. The words ‘Single Mother’ radiate strength to me that a person can do such a complex job on their own. You don’t have to be a single mother to relate to this poem, maybe you’ve been raised by a single mother or perhaps men you have left your ex to be a single mother. Either way I’m sure all will relate somehow.

Let me ask u guys a question!

When you look at a single mother, what is it that you see?
A strong woman that can raise children on her own…
or an incomplete broken family?

U see To me a single mother.. is a strong individual that has no choice but to raise her children on her own,
And I’m sure I speak for many single mothers when I say that we didn’t plan to bring up our children alone

Do we choose to be single mothers? That’s usually not the case.
But who do we blame? Do we blame the mothers or do we blame the fathers for this stereotyped race?

Me personally, Raising my daughter as a single parent was never easy as i had her at a very young age,
But in this world that we now live in, it’s usually hard work to get the natural fathers to positively engage!

So what do we do?

We have to take on a role that we were never built to do,
Instead of being one parent of a family we end up playing the roles of two

Sacrificing meals just so that we can feed our children is one of the many sacrifices that we may have to make
Sometimes having to take up two jobs that we may not even like, all for our children’s sake

Not to mention the worry of when our child gets ill then having to play the parts of two people
It’s so hard bringing up children in a role when we already know it should be equal.

So what next?

I know a lot of us worry thinking which man would want to take up our child as their own
But there’s many many many men out there who God has given the grace to be stepfathers so that we don’t have to do it alone.

I am living proof that there is hope for us single mothers to find that love again,
The hard work that you and i put into being mothers will surely not be in vain
God sees it all

Inspired by God
Written by Chantell Douglas (c)

chantell_douglas@hotmail.com

SALUTING THE SISTERS – C.LOVE

editor — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 00:41:01 +0000

Her ancestors inspire her
And nothing gets her stressed
Her husband still admires her
Her children call her blessed
She rises way before the sun
To face the day ahead
She knows just what she’s toiling for.

It’s all planned in her head.
She’s dedicated and hard working

But it’s not just for herself

She’s working for her family.

It’s not about the wealth.

She knows why she is working hard.

For when the flock has grown.

She’ll sit and rest and praise.

Because she’s reaping where she’s sown.

As she goes about her business.

She inspires and motivates.

Women for Africa we salute you.

It is you we nominate!!!

WOMAN, WOMAN, WOMAN…

editor — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 11:58:42 +0000

Women are beautiful, creative, special, influential, encouraging, amazing and exciting. When we look all around we see women everywhere. How would the world be without women? How many hats does a woman have to wear? Mother, sister, aunty, friend, protector, guide, helper, and the list goes on and on yet the woman continues in all her strength and beauty to be all that she can be.

Women are to be celebrated, appreciated, recognised and honoured. Not because of anything but just that Women are women and that is what they were created to be.

Oprah Winfrey says ‘You don’t become what you want, you become what you believe’

I firmly believe in that statement and I see it all around. Women everywhere doing what they believe in. So let’s take out time to recognise this and give them the credit due to them. Every now and again pick up the phone and let that woman know she is amazing, she is doing a fantastic job or even that her presence alone makes a difference. It won’t take long and it won’t cost a thing if done face to face.

‘There are two ways of reflecting light… to be the candle, or the mirror that reflects it’. Edith Wharton